Saturday, September 16, 2006
i like to sit and daydream. (:
well..didnt haf a gd day yday. coz i juz feel so much anger filling mi inside. but well. i guessed i've swallowed it. this entry might be somewhat related to the previous. maybe i had not said enuf, and need to vent it all out.
these questions were revolving myself yday, the words and the image juz made me feel uneasy, no appetite, made mi feel uncomfortable on top, and mid.
(does this sound seirous? haha..oops sorry)
-why is this happening?
-why izzit all happening now again?
-does it mean i gotta go on with it by having the "past" or even the "present" lingering around me?
-when can these all stop?
-is there anything i can do? is there anything i can do to make him not go back?
tot of it the whole day. was chatting with cat bout wat really happened before. the whole thing. she asked. maybe coz it was all messy and blurred last time.
tinking bout how the past can revolve into now..somehow amazes me. how we met. how we talk to each other. how the misunderstanding all started. how u wld pour ur sadness to me last time. how we say we wld stand by each other. how i was disappointed once. how i stopped myself from making 'communication' with u coz i din wan the same misunderstanding to happen again. how we spoke again. how we started out.
hmmm, i duno but it somehow amazes me, and am still feel like i'm living in a dream. haha. maybe it's the time that has past and went thru tat made our understand each other betta somehow. how i can hold on to wat i believe. how u made changes to ur life to adapt to diff situation.
it's all gd. it's all wonderful. it's all sad but sweet. memories huh. memories aint easily erased. i understand. i cherish."to the extent that these haunters makes their hauntees feel insecure..
in my opinion, since we can't forget the bad, remember the good and keep them in mind, always. because they never fail to bring a smile to one's face. (and even if u'd cry, u'll be crying cos you're glad those happy ones existed).
if everyday was a perfectly happy day, without sadness, anger or frustration, then why are we here on Earth? we should be in heaven by now.
it was said that one wouldn't know what happiness was until he/she experienced sadness/anger/frustration - feelings along those lines. its just like saying, do we have to hate someone to know what it is like to feel love? but how true are these statements? - i wonder." -ab's blog.
i read thru ab's blog..and felt that wat she wrote is so true. i mean after wat happened yday.
haunters and hauntees. why make urself put in the position tat make u so miserable, rather than seeing it in a clearer point of view, which somehow juz came into my mind..
"why see it as a bad thing tat happened? make it might not be gd, but it aint bad. coz the pt is tat u've haf wat u wan and wat u need now. being by ur side, protecting u, loving u. why question ur own abilities and ur confidence becoz of such thing? it's not worth it, coz what has happened has happened and somethings are beyond our ability to control or to stop wat others wanna say or think. juz noe tat u're lucky and happy now, that things are at ur side. people are supporting u, standing by u. esp the MOST IMPT person in ur life. YOU HAVE HIM! brace uP!"..this thought juz went thru my mind.
maybe there's really no use getting all angry and upset, coz it's wat ppl wanna say, what really is happening btwn both of us, nobody will noe. coz onli u noe me, and i noe u. that's wat really matters. phew. i felt relieved somehow. maybe it's still somewhere deep inside. but i dun wanna care bout it anymore. no use getting tired bout this. hmm. went to zx's 21st yday. 3 of us gorge ourselves with so much beehoon and curry(coz tat's all tat is left haha)and den left. haha. so paiseh. hmmm. went over to cat's place to stay last nite. this morning smthing funny happened. suppose to bring Dexter, cat's dog to the vet. he was in the "cage-box" thing...and he started to jump and fell off the chair. hahhahaa..he was upside down..so funnie..and den he was shivering coz he scared i tink hee.
well well am back hm. feeling abit tired still. dear's at work. (i guess now many ppl noe where he work le. hmmm u'll get visitors ba dear)dunno if can meet him later. we'll see. i need u.
whoa, din noe i write so much le haha. this is going to be a long entry. hee. bleah.
magnanimous, i will be.终于做了这个决定
(i've finally made my mind)别人怎么说我不理
(i don't care what others say)只要你也一样的肯定
(as long as u can be assured too)我愿意天涯海角都随你去
(I will go all over the world for you)我知道一切不容易
(It won't be easy, I know)我的心一直温习说服自己
(All i can do is to convince myself)最怕你忽然说要放弃
(i'm just afraid that you'll suddenly give up on our love) 爱真的需要勇气
(Alot of courage is needed)来面对流言蜚语
(to face the words of truth and lies from others)只要你一个眼神肯定
(but just with your assurance)我的爱就有意义
(my love for you is all worth it)我们都需要勇气
(Both of us need the courage and trust)去相信会在一起
(to believe that we'll be together)人潮拥挤我能感觉你
(in the midst of the crowd, i feel you)放在我手心里你的真心
(coz your love will always lingers within my palm)如果我的坚强任性
(if my stubborness and temper)会不小心伤害了你
(might/have hurt you)你能不能温柔提醒
(can you please tell me my wrong gently)我虽然心太急更害怕错过你
(coz i might seem all eager to be with you, i just dun wanna lose you)you're mine.
4:09 PM
